Now That You Mention It...

Just So We're All on the Same page...

Since I didn't include (thus far) an FAQ on my Official Writer Website of Awesomeness, I thought I'd address some of those oft-heard queries in a blog post.

So I present: The Answers to the Most Common Question People Ask Writer Maureen:

1. No, I don't know Stephenie Meyer or J.K. Rowling.

2. No, my book doesn't have vampires in it...Well, my books don't really...No, I don't think vampires would work in my...Nevermind. Thanks for the suggestion.

3. Yes, I still have a day job. Writing barely paid for my laptop and a case of wine from Trader Joe's. My day job still pays the bills and it's too cold in Chicago to live on a park bench. See this jingling tin cup though? Feel free to drop any spare change into it.

4. Yeah, it took kind of a long time to write a book.

5. No, I won't give you a free copy of my book. I is broke. See #3 above.

6. No, my publisher isn't taking me on a huge publication tour or paying for a book launch party. They rarely do for debut authors. If I get enough money in this tin can though...

7. No, my book isn't like DaVinci Code. (Eyes immediately fall) It's about...(Eyes quickly glaze over because I don't mention vampires or the Knights Templars)

8. Yeah, my book will be available in real bookstores. Why do you look surprised? Did you think I'd be selling copies out of the trunk of my car? Or that I'd sell books through a weird-scam pyramid scheme? ('I would like to tell you about a unique investment opportunity...")

9. Um. Maybe. There's a chance I could put you in one of my books. Do something really stupid. Right now...OK, great. You're in!

10. No, the book isn't out yet. It takes like 18months-2years for a book to come out...I'm not kidding...Yeah, it sucks.

I think that just about covers it! Now, if you'll excuse me, time to go break into the Trader Joe's wine paid for my by mad book money. Cash money, ya'll!

All Official and Writer-Like!

Breaking News!

My website is now officially live. Click here for the awesomeness.

My Life Needs to be Copy Edited

Lots of super exciting things to report around here...

Like, I'm making a whole host of appetizers for the Superbowl.

AND, I'm going to Target tomorrow because our microwave went BZZZZ! really loudly before incinerating a frozen chicken nugget in a blue-light electrical storm. (It was kind of awesome and sort of worth buying a new microwave.)

Not to mention, I'm applying for a library card at the local college today so I can check out this obscure book on a mythological creature that I cannot find anywhere but must read for my next book.

So, yeah.

Exciting stuff.

I did get all of my extra copy edits turned in, and managed to answer some more proofreader-related questions yesterday. I have a serious respect for copy editors and proofreaders. They ask the kind of questions that I would never ponder. But good, important, relevant ones. Like, in one scene in A Bump, Clare and her best friend Julie are shopping at Victoria's Secret. In the scene, I referred to the dressing rooms as having curtains. Didn't think anything of it, right? Well, the proofreader came back and said most Victoria's Secret dressing rooms now have doors instead of curtains, so would I like to change it?

Seriously. I'm so big-picture about nearly everything in my life, that I would've never thought about that detail. Like, ever. But she's right. So I changed it.

It's about this stage, that despite all of the cover proofs, author questionnaires, building an author website, I've come to realize my book is bigger than me. It's not just some manuscript that I wrote on my shiny laptop. There's like, PEOPLE, involved. People who will think to question the dressing room adornments in Victoria's Secret.

And that's kind of scary, but pretty awesome all at the same time.

I just found this picture--it's from way back from March of last year, when I recieved my first package of edits from my editor. Notice I am quite nervous. My son? Not so much.

Post Novel Trauma Continues

Things to do while in between books and waiting on revision notes:

• Open email. Minimize. Stare at "(0) new emails" approximately every five seconds

• Worry that internet connection has somehow been corrupted and refresh inbox at least once an hour

• Continuously sigh loudly so people think you're having some kind of respiratory distress

• Read lots of books. The kind written by other people.

• Stifle urge to cry out, "I really need to start another book" due to death-ray-like glares received from spouse. (Who so DOES NOT want to be ignored again for like three months while I write aforementioned book.)

• Laugh about Governor Blagojevich’s "media tour."

• Pace around house, proclaiming great desire to bake things from scratch. (Note I said merely "proclaim" as opposed to actually doing it.)

• Count number of days until Cubs tickets go onsale.

• Make list of random tasks I’ve meant to do forever, like organizing my garage, programming my cell phone and printing photos from snapfish. (Again, notice "make list," not "do.")

• BLOG!

Sunfire Romances: Publishing Crown Jewel

A child obsessed with reading, I have many "old friends" boxed up in my parents' basement--Sweet Valley High, Baby Sitters Club, Taffy Sinclair, Sleepover Friends, and pretty much any craptastic book sent to me by some weird Scholastic book club thing that I somehow got signed up for.

Many of these books are burned so deeply into my psyche, that I remember character details at random moments, like when I heard a recent news story mention the car brand "Fiat" and immediately went, "Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield's car."

So it's always a surprise to me when I suddenly remember a long-forgotten Book Made of Awesome. Like tonight. When I had a memory flash and my BFF Google lead me to this:

 

I had completely forgotten about these books. Sunfire Romances, published in the '80s. My favorite of which was this book, Cassie. I don't remember the plot, something about her being kidnapped and raised by Indians and then having to return to her real parents, but I do remember I thought it was the Best. Book. Ever. Written. And wished I could someday write a book even half as awesome.

What's most hilarious about this is that I used to borrow these books from my elementary school's library. CATHOLIC elementary school. So, I was probably in what, sixth grade? Isn't sixth grade a little young to be reading romances? Or maybe I'm just so old now that it doesn't seem appropriate for grade schoolers to be reading about lovin'?

Regardless, I'm going to tear my parents' basement apart until I find this book. Because I really DO need to know if Cassie's love is "as wild and untameable as the frontier itself." Like, immediately.

Betamax and Laser Discs

Pass pages are finished! Can I get a Woo Hoo? Of course, I had like zero time to do them the past two weeks, with yet ANOTHER trip to Ohio last weekend for a close friend's baby shower. So, I had to overnight them this morning since they're due tomorrow. Being a harried working mom now officially has a price: $37.

Other than Fabulous Post Office trips, nothin' new to report 'round these parts. I'm waiting on notes for my second and third books from Awesome Agent, so I'm still in the weird book limbo of not really being sure what to do with myself. An idea for another book is starting to germinate, but I'm nowhere near ready to start composing again.

What else? Oh yes! I'm working on my Fancy Official Author Website, which I'm hoping to have done by the end of next week. Hopefully people won't find it by googling "man uses neti pot and brain explodes" like they do for this blog. Which, by the way, sounds really horrible and painful, and probably a featured topic on an upcoming Dateline.

I finally read and finished Wicked Lovely last week, which was just as fantastic as everyone says it is. Next up I'm going to read the Gemma Doyle books from Libba Bray. Which came out like a frillion years ago. But I'm playing catch up here, people. Don't mock the out-of-the-loop writer or else I'll start prognosticating about how I have no idea how to load songs on my iPod and thought SKYPE was a type of vodka.

Official Playlist for Book #3

Just for fun, below is the Official Playlist for Book #3.

It's a weird, eclectic mix of some Irish music, classic rock and others.

I'm Shipping Up to Boston--Dropkick Murphys

Green & Red of Mayo--Brendan Loughrey

Rush--Big Audio Dynamite

Paint it Black--Rolling Stones

Tuesday Morning--Pogues

Paralyzer--Finger Eleven

Danny Boy--Brendan Loughrey

Another Brick in the Wall--Pink Floyd

Fields of Athenry--Dubliners

How Soon is Now--Love Spit Love

TTFN!

PNT: Post Novel Trauma

Remember yesterday, how I was so full of joy at all things writing related? Remember how I proclaimed victory like Drama in Entourage?

Well, I'm still victorious, yet now the Post Novel Trauma has begun. As in, I've been working so hard that free time is an uncomfortable concept.

And yes, I still have pass pages (approval of book pages that are laid out to look like a real book and stuff) to do for A Bump, but I'm all, "pass pages?" Those are too EASY. I need some hardcore revisions to tackle; a character to add, a storyline to implode. Although Holly could always come back at me with a thirty page revision letter to This Book Rulez and Has Irish Stuff In It, until then, I mope and marvel at other people's work, since my TBR pile is quite looming.

I've decided the definition of where I'm at is going to be called a Novel Orphan. Because last night I felt like I should be whistling "It's A Hard Knock Life" while dancing around with a mop. (But did not. Instead watched Confessions of a Teen Idol on DVR. Which I decided would be so much better if its included at least one of the Coreys, the guy who played Jake Ryan in Sixteen Candles, and, the ultimate teen idol, William Zabka--the guy who played the jerk in just about every movie made in the '80s)

Oh, and check out my interview with my agent, Holly Root, at The Novel Girls! For all you unagented YA writers, sounds like you have a new name to put on your query list!

Rah Rah I Rule

V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!

Victory! Victory!

Go Me!

Sorry, my high school cheerleading days have taken over my brain a bit.

But? Seriously--VICTORY!

Because I'm done. Just shipped off Book #3, still jokingly referred to as This Book Ruelz and Has Irish Stuff In It. I refined a lot of the book, totally revamped an important supporting character, changed someone from evil to good, threw in more backstory at the request of my agent (To all you writers out there--I KNOW. Never think you're gonna hear "more backstory please," right?), and added in a few more hurdles for my main character to jump.

But overall? So, so much better.

Like fifty kajillion to the 100th degree better.

So now. I wait.

I've been so busy trying to get these two books turned in that I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. Although, I did just get my first "pass pages" from my editor, so I'll be working on those. And attacking my "To Be Read" pile with a great vengeance.

Ciao!

Kitteh Sez: Reevize!

The soul-sucking revisions to Book #3? Not so soul-sucking after all. More like time-sucking, but my soul remains intact. For now. Thanks to the complex plot, I've found it's much easier to revise in long stretches of time, rather than little snippets, so I don't lose track of where exactly I am with regards to plot development.

Yet? Long stretches of time? Not exactly easy to come by these days. In fact, my toddler gets extraordinarily pissed off whenever I tear my attention away from him for a brief moment to check my email, feed the dog, or, you know, pee.

But, I'm about halfway through the book, which isn't too shabby since I only started on Monday. So, yes, it will be done. Oh yes. It will be.

And now, I'll leave you with a bit of revision-LOLcat humor (by a cat who looks startlingly like my old cat Buddy, who loved two things: eating and peeing on the carpet in my parents' basement):

more animals